The Pale King – Chapter 14

Dear Dave,

Last April I shared a special moment with a handful of Wallace-l listers at Skylight Books in Hollywood.  To celebrate the release of The Pale King we took turns reading our favorite passages from our favorite of your books.  We shared laughs and smiles as we heard excerpts from Infinite Jest, Brief Interviews, A Supposedly Fun Thing, even Everything and More.  Then to close the party, one of the hosts read from §14 of The Pale King, the brief interview in which the nameless narrator tells of the play he wants to write.

He[1] describes it as “a totally real, true-to-life play.  It would be unperformable, that was part of the point” (106).  It’s about an IRS wiggler going over tax returns.  “He sits there longer and longer until the audience gets more and more bored and restless, and finally they start leaving, first just a few and then the whole audience, whispering to each other how boring and terrible the play is.  Then once the audience have all left, the real action of the play can start” (106).

Reflecting on this passage – one of the many gems in this great unfinished work – in light of my reading and rereading of the novel and the many discussions I have had about the book, it seems to me that this single page is perhaps one of the best summaries of the entire novel.  This unwritten play in which the wiggler just sits there and nothing really happens is a sort of microcosm of the rest of the book.  The novel is all back story and set-up with no real payoff.[2]  Like the fictional audience, we’re waiting and waiting for something to happen, but it never does.[3]

Further reflection got me to thinking about how if this play is a sort of microcosm of the novel, then perhaps the novel is a sort of microcosm of the human experience.  Isn’t most of life just a lot of waiting around for something to happen?  As you say in “This is Water,” “There happen to be whole large parts of American life that… involve boredom, routine, and petty frustration” (64-65).  Like the audience, we wait and wait and nothing happens, and we get restless, and we get up and move on to other things.

It’s like that borderline-cliché John Lennon line that says, “Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.”[4]  We get antsy and bored and frustrated with the “day-in-day-out” of adult life and don’t realize the things right in front of us that we’re missing out on.  Like the fish in the “didactic little parable-ish story,” we are left asking, “What the hell is water?”

There is so much more to the play, there is so much more to the novel, and there is so much more to our human experience if we will just pause long enough to take notice.


[1] The nameless narrator, #917229047, is also genderless, but I’m going to use the third person male pronoun here for simplicity’s sake.  I hope everyone’s ok with that.

[2] There’s plenty of payoff in a literary and aesthetic sense, but not so much in terms of plot.  We read about where everyone comes from and how and why they enlisted in the Service, but the story doesn’t really go anywhere after that.  It seems more of a character study and thematic exploration than it does your typical plot-driven novel.

[3] In Antwerp, during our many post-conference-proceedings discussions while enjoying a wide variety of delicious Belgian beers, I posited once or twice that I wonder if the novel was really finishable.  Tragic death aside, is this a story that could be finished?  Can a novel about mind-numbing boredom ever be brought to a conclusion?  If so, what would that ending look like?  Like the play, is the novel “unperformable”?

[4] Well not exactly like it, but kinda close.

The Pale King – Chapter 13

Dear Dave,

In the fall in my AP English Lit classes – which consist of mostly seniors – I have my students write one of their college application essays for a class assignment so that I can give them feedback on their writing and hopefully better their chances of getting into the college of their dreams.  Most colleges’ prompts are pretty formulaic and lend themselves nicely to a standard five-paragraph essay, but on the advice of a veteran teacher I recommend (actually demand would be a better word for it) that they tell a story rather than write an overused five-paragraph essay.  I tell them that stories are more memorable and impactful and more likely to provide that extra edge in the cut-throat arena of college admissions.[1]

Most of these essays cover your standard topics: death of a loved one, moving to a new school, learning a lesson from a community service experience.  But one student, J–, wrote an essay that grabbed my attention right from the start.  He told the story of how, several years prior, he began experiencing a rather peculiar tingling sensation at the base of his skull.  A little research on WebMD had him convinced he had a brain tumor.  Too scared to say anything, he waited to see what would happen; knowing what symptoms he ought to look out for should the “tumor” progress.  Nothing did happen, and after his next annual physical he realized that there was nothing wrong with him.[2]  He concluded the essay reflecting on the lesson he quietly learned about the dangers of over-thinking and overreacting to a situation.

Reading the opening line of §13 reminded me ever so slightly of reading this student’s essay several years ago.

“It was in public high school that this boy learned the terrible power of attention and what you pay attention to.  He learned it in a way whose very ridiculousness was part of what made it so terrible.  And terrible it was” (91).[3]

Like my former student, David Cusk learned the difficult burden of hyper-self-awareness.  For J–, this hyper-awareness took the form of unnecessary anxiety.  For Cusk, this hyper-awareness manifests itself in sudden and severe sweating attacks.  And like the Depressed Person, the fear of an oncoming attack and the hyper-awareness of his surroundings only compound the severity of Cusk’s attacks.

I’ve come to know a little something about fear and anxiety over the last few years.  I’ll just come out and say it: I have anxiety issues.  I tend to internalize and worry about things way more than I should.  Little things, big things; insignificant things, important things.  It doesn’t really matter.  I worry about it all.

And if that’s not enough, I tend to have adverse physical reactions to this often-unnecessary stress.  Including, but not limited to eye twitches, muscle spasms in my back and neck, and migraine headaches.

So my worrying causes these adverse physical responses, which then causes me to worry even more.  What if it’s not just a headache?  What if these pains are from something more serious?  So I worry some more, which only makes the headache or muscle spasms worse, which makes me worry all the more.  It’s a vicious cycle, really.  An ugly, vicious cycle.

I found myself in the midst of one of these downward spirals recently.  I don’t really remember what started it[4] – probably something of very little import – but I found myself stressed out and not feeling well and stressed out about not feeling well.  Then I caught a glance of my right wrist.

“This is Water”[5]

I can’t control my circumstances.  I can’t change what’s going on around me.  But I can choose my response.  I don’t have to let these things get me down.  I don’t have to revert to the “default setting.”  I just keep telling myself:

“This is Water.”

“This is Water.”

“This is Water.”


[1] Unfortunately, in some cases, not even a damn good essay was enough to allow some of my top students rise to the top of the “keep” pile.  It’s often a sad time in early spring when my students with a 4.whatever GPA and stellar resumes get a rejection letter from their first-choice university.  If being valedictorian of a rather competitive prep school doesn’t get you into a top-tier school, then I don’t know what will.

[2] This hypochondriac’s essay was an interesting – if not humorous – counterpart to another student’s essay about how he actually suffered a brain tumor as a child.  His was an inspiring story of faith and perseverance in the midst of a very frightening ordeal.  He’s perfectly fine now, aside from a rather large scar on his scalp.

[3] This opening line is also rather reminiscent of the opening line of “The Depressed Person” from Brief Interviews: “The depressed person was in terrible and unceasing emotional pain, and the impossibility of sharing or articulating this pain was itself a component and a contributing factor in its essential horror” (37).

[4] I rarely ever do remember what it is that gives me that little nudge that begins the newest cycle.

[5] Written in – as I told my students after returning from my trip to Antwerp for the “Work in Process” conference – very, very, very permanent marker.

The Pale King – Chapter 9: “Author Here”

Dear Dave,

I’m curious, why put the “Author’s Foreword” nine sections in?  Was this your decision; did you specify it in the notes and drafts you left behind?  Was it Michael Pietsch’s call?  I guess this question gives me a good excuse to make the pilgrimage to the Ransom Center to comb through the archives in search of an answer.[1]

Aside from why it’s in section 9, my other question is why include it in the first place?  Of all the narrative experimentation you’ve conducted in your short stories and novel-length fiction, why this?  You’ve trodden so much new literary territory, why go stomping through this stale ground?  Perhaps more reason to venture to Austin, Texas.

One possible theory I have is that it is a satirical jab at the postmodern meta-fiction cliché of the novel-that-says-it’s-really-a-true-story-but-the-author-makes-no-attempts-to-hide-the-fact-that-it’s-actually-a-work-of-fiction.[2]  If so, well done.

Another possibility, one I want to explore here, takes us back to Infinite Jest and then even further back to Shakespeare’s classic tragedy, Hamlet.  My undergrad Shakespeare professor – whose name escapes me now some fourteen years later – pointed out an interesting observation about the opening lines of Hamlet.  In that first scene, Francisco is keeping watch and Bernardo approaches from offstage to relieve Francisco of his post.  Yet it is Bernardo who first asks, “Who’s there?” Francisco replies – loosely paraphrased – “No buddy, you tell me who’s there!”  The standing guard ought to be the one asking, “Who’s there?” not the one approaching… that is unless there is “something rotten in the state of Denmark.”[3]  This disjointedness in the opening lines foreshadows the turmoil that fills the rest of the four-hour play.

Fast forward to 1996 and Infinite Jest.  Many scholars, writers, and readers of your works have pointed out the plethora of references and allusions to Hamlet throughout IJ, but what caught my attention was Matt Bucher’s mention in the “How to Read Infinite Jest” introduction to the Infinite Summer group read of how the first two words in IJ are “I am” spoken by Hal, almost as if in response to Bernardo’s opening question.  If the out-of-sync exchange between Bernardo and Francisco in the opening scene of Hamlet foreshadow trouble to come later in the play, perhaps so does Hal’s opening line in IJ.[4]  While I haven’t made it very far into Infinite Jest, there is the little matter of chapter 1 ending with Hal going bat-crap crazy in the Dean of Admissions’ office and having to be restrained and dragged out of the room.  And I am sure there is plenty of other turmoil that ensues as the story progresses.

Which brings us to § 9 of The Pale King.  The “Author’s Foreword” with its opening of “Author here.”  Do these opening words – while not at the actual beginning of the novel – also foreshadow future turmoil and unrest?  If so, what is that turmoil and unrest, and where is it found within this piecemeal, nonlinear, unfinished novel?  I posed the question on Wallace-l about a possible Hamlet connection in this section and received some very insightful responses.[5]

I went back and reread the section to see if I could find more answers to my questions.  Here is what I found:

The Pale King is, in other words, a kind of vocational memoir.  It is also supposed to function as a portrait of a bureaucracy – arguably the most important federal bureaucracy in American Life – at a time of enormous internal struggle and soul-searching, the birth pains of what’s come to be known among tax professionals as the New IRS (p. 70).

1985 was a critical year for American taxation and for the Internal Revenue Service’s enforcement of the US tax code.  In brief, that year saw not only fundamental changes in the Service’s operational mandate, but also the climax of an involved intra-Service battle between advocates and opponents of an increasingly automated computerized tax system.  For complex administrative reasons, the Midwest Regional Examination Center became one of the venues in which the battle’s crucial phase played out (p. 82).

The real reason why US citizens were / are not aware of these conflicts, changes, and stakes in that the whole subject of tax policy and administration is dull.  Massively, spectacularly dull (p. 83).

To me, at least in retrospect, the really interesting question is why dullness proves such a powerful impediment to attention.  Why we recoil from dull.  Maybe it’s because dullness is intrinsically painful; maybe that’s where phrases like ‘deadly dull’ or ‘excruciatingly dull’ come from.  But there might be more to it.  Maybe dullness is associated with psychic pain because something that’s dull or opaque fails to provide enough stimulation to distract people from some other, deeper type of pain that is always there, if only in an ambient low-level way, and which most of us spend nearly all our time and energy trying to distract ourselves from feeling or at least from feeling directly or with our full attention.  Admittedly, the whole thing’s pretty confusing, and hard to talk about abstractly… but surely something must lie behind not just Muzak in dull or tedious places anymore but now also actual TV in waiting rooms, supermarkets’ checkouts, airports’ gates, SUVs’ backseats.  Walkmen, iPods, BlackBerries, cell phones that attach to your head.  This terror of silence with nothing diverting to do.  I can’t think anyone really believes that today’s so-called ‘information society’ is just about information.  Everyone knows it’s about something else, way down (p. 85).

The turmoil: the upheaval and systemic changes taking place in the mid-80s in the IRS, and the fact that these changes went virtually unnoticed by the American public because they were so dull and boring that no one cared.

But, based on the final quote above, it goes deeper than that.  The battle is not just the bureaucratic changes happening at the Internal Revenue Service that are hidden and masked in dullness and boredom.  The battle is one against dullness and boredom itself.  What a formidable foe indeed.

It might be a bit of a stretch, but I’d like to posit this might be part of the reason for the “Author here” beginning of § 9.  But I think I’ll need a trip to the Archives to check if I’m right.


[1] A recent email exchange with Greg Carlisle lent a good literary reason, one that works within the whole of the novel, but I will elaborate on that later.

[2] I first came across this narrative style in Yann Martel’s Life of Pi, in which the “Author’s Note,” in which the narrator / “author” tells of his journey to India in search of a great story, is actually the start of the story itself (I have to tell my AP students this several times when we begin reading the book).  Martel used a similar narrative approach in his follow-up novel, Beatrice and Virgil, but – in my opinion – it didn’t work quite so well.  Then it reared its ugly head about three-quarters of the way through a book I just recently finished, Steve Hely’s How I Became a Famous Novelist.  Hely pulled the someone-suggested-I-write-my-story-and-here-it-is one out of his hat, which, I have to admit, ruined the book ever so slightly for me.*  I really enjoyed it up until that point, although I suppose I should have seen it coming.

*In case I’m being too subtle or too nice (because I did enjoy the three books mentioned above; in fact Life of Pi is one of my all-time favorites): I don’t like the whole pomo ploy of author-writing-as-narrator-saying-he’s-really-the-author.

[3] Of course, we all know there have been ghost sightings during the night watch at Elsinore and everyone is on edge.

[4] To be honest, this assertion on my part is purely speculative.  I have had – or perhaps have listened in on would be a better way to put it – many a conversation about Hal and the rest of the cast of Infinite Jest.  I have twice attempted to begin reading the thousand-page magnum opus, only to make it to about page 50.  While I’d like to blame it on bad timing or unforeseen circumstances that prevented me from finishing, I’ll have to admit that my not having made it more than 10% of the way through the book is probably due to my – as one commenter on the Infinite Summer website put it – lack of testicular solidity.

But I have decided to attempt to tackle the beast one more time this coming summer.  I’m going to finish Infinite Jest or die trying.

… ok, maybe that last line was a bit melodramatic.  But I really want to finish the book, dammit.

[5] Greg Carlisle, author of Elegant Complexity (a study of Infinite Jest) had this to say:

Hamlet doesn’t speak until several minutes into the play, well into Act I, scene ii. His first words are not to a character, but an aside to the audience: “a little more than kin, and less than kind.” That aside is the equivalent of saying “character here.” Hamlet will continue to make asides, including seven really long ones (the soliloquies). These asides can get obsessed and digressive, but it’s a play, so they can’t go on forever.

The character in The Pale King who says “author here” well into the book is a little more than kin to the author of The Pale King, and his assessments of some of the other characters could be said to be less than kind. He continues to speak to us in long asides as well as being a character in the book. His asides can be more obsessed and digressive than those in a play, but they can’t go on forever either.

Before Hamlet kills Polonius he is treated like a prince. Before Dave Wallace is discovered not to be who they think he is, he is treated like a prince.

Then Hamlet is banished to England. Wallace is threatened with some kind of punishment (isn’t he?) and then banished to a regular office instead of the throne-like office he would have received.